Erykah Badu and My Naked Dream

I told my husband about my recurring dreams I have had for years on the way home from the airport the other night, one of which was finding myself totally nude in public. It usually started as something that seemed so "normal" like going out on a jog naked, but in the midst of it I went through a shift of paradigm that it probably wasn't such a good idea, after all, so that I began to freak out a little bit and feeling somewhat shamed by my nakedness, yet I tried to act normal and revive the feeling why I thought going out naked in public was such a good idea in the first place and carried on with the task in hand or rushed through it.

I've been always trying to interpret that dream as something to do with my vulnerability or when I was feeling shaky inside. As poetic and Freudian as it may be, I can never understand the work and profundity of my subconscious mind to concoct something as allegoric as that one.

That was not until on the same day the news broke about Erykah Badu's naked video clip shot on a Dallas street with the ending of her being assasinated at the exact spot JFK met his destiny some 40 years ago. (And she was on Jimmy Kimmel that night and my husband persisted on watching her and I didn't know who she was or what her appeal was)

At the end of the footage, she narrated off camera: "They who play it safe, are quick to assassinate what they don't understand. They move in packs, ingesting more and more fear with every act of hate on one another. They feel more comfortable in groups, less guilt to swallow. They are us. This is what we have become, afraid to respect the individual."

Ummmm....that clip actually works. I think she's spot on with her message whether or not what she did was a mere publicity stunt pretentiously cloaked in something philosophical. I feel I've found the explanation to my dream.

This is me, warts and all, you like it or not. In my nakedness, that's my authentic self. It doesn't always conform to societal dictate but I like being me. Yes I sometimes jitter at the judgment cast at me but at the end of the day I can't deny myself.

Now the more pertinent existential question is I wonder when Badu's (unwashed) underwear will turn up on ebay. The lucky bastard who picked up her clothes will surely make more than a few dimes. (I apologize for the work and profundity or lack thereof of my conscious mind but the video is giving me the liberty to embrace myself so fully now.)